Welcome to the 50th episode of Live Your Dream podcast!
Wow I can’t believe this is my 50th episode!
I remember the day when I decided to start my podcast and I googled how to start a podcast. Yeah, that’s how I started. There were so many things I didn’t know how to do and I was especially scared of all the equipment and wasn’t sure how I was going to figure everything out.
But I didn’t let what I don’t know prevent me from just getting started and you are now listening to my 50th episode!
I am so thankful that you’ve been with me through this journey, and supporting me. It really means a lot. When I started my podcast, I didn’t know who would listen, and but I kept creating new episodes with the hope that somehow my stories will help some people, and I was so surprised, when I saw that many of you are listening from so many different countries around the world!
I have listeners from over 100 countries around the world, in fact it may actually be more than than that now, because it was awhile ago when I checked the stats. So thank you so much for listening!
And I really really mean it. I know that you are giving me the most valuable thing you have, which is your time, and there are so many different podcast out there and you have chosen to spend time with me, and I really feel blessed to have this opportunity to share my stories with you and I promise to do my very best to keep creating new episodes that could help you in your journey to living your dreams.
I also want to give a shout out to my audio engineer Chris, who has been with me from the very beginning of this journey. Thank you Chris so much for being so supportive and patient, even when I was doing things last min and felt so rushed, I could always count on you and you worked your magic on every single episode. I really couldn’t have it done it without you. So thank you thank you!!
Since this is my 50th episode, I thought it would be fun to do something different so I’m doing Ask Me Anything episode. I want to thank you for sending me the questions and sharing your lessons learned from my podcast.
I want to first read you a message I got from a listener from Japan, her name Mari and she shared with me her takeaways from my podcast.
Whether it’s through Celina’s presence, podcast or more currently, her Clubhouse room, you instantly know that Celina is not just the most kindest and nonjudgmental person you have ever met, but she also has an incredible amount of wisdom into the human psyche and how she can fully harness that to support and encourage people to achieve their respective dreams and goals.
Listening to Celina’s podcast episodes has served to be both a relief and an incredible motivator for me – when I find myself procrastinating and beating myself over it, Celina’s “confession” of also procrastinating makes me feel less alone; when I am feeling dejected when that job application gets rejected, Celina’s story of also being rejected during her process of writing her book and getting it published helps me to get over myself, stop feeling sorry for myself and to move on to the next opportunity.
Getting to know Celina’s personal journey is also a testament to the fact that if we get relentlessly honest with ourselves and continue to work on the issues and blocks that come up for us, living a life true to your heart does not have to remain a distant dream.
Personally, coming from an Asian background where failure and rejection is not exactly encouraged, a big overall takeaway from listening to Celina’s podcast has made me realize that it’s part of everyone’s human experience to come across what we deem to be “negative” things in life, but the important thing is to bounce back and to use it to advance ourselves closer to our dreams.
Wow Omg, thank you so much Mari! I am speechless reading what you have shared with me and beyond grateful for you listening, and sharing with me your thoughts. And I’m so happy and excited to know that my podcast has helped you in your journey to living your dreams.
If you enjoy listening to my podcast, or if it helped you in anyway, I’d be so grateful if you can please tell your friends about it and also share on social media.
I’m relying on you to help me grow my podcast so I can help more people through the stories I share.
One big way you can help me is by writing me a review. I love reading your reviews and it means so much to me. And it totally makes my day. And it keeps me motivated to keep creating new episodes even on days when it’s really hard to do so.
I currently have 84 reviews on Apple Podcast and I hope you can help me get to 100 reviews! That’s my goal!
So I’d be really grateful if you can please write me a review on Apple Podcast or if you listen from an Android phone, you can leave a review on Podchaser. I’ll include both links on the show notes for today’s episode.
You can see the show notes by opening up your podcast app and clicking on today’s show notes.
I received a lot of questions for todays’ episode, and I have selected a few to answer today. If I don’t get to answer your question today, please know that I will consider them as topics for future episodes so I hope you will continue to check out the new episodes I create.
Ok let me read you the first question.
How do you choose and set up so many wonderful people to interview on your podcast?? I remember you talking about how you had to try many times to have Debbie Milman on your show. Is it usually like that??
I don’t have a set criteria for who I choose to interview on my podcast, but I invite people that I find to be inspiring. I read books, and listen to a lot of podcasts, and I’m always looking for inspirational stories to share on my podcast.
Sometimes, I have to try many times to get an interview, like Debbie, I tried 5 times before she said yes, as I shared in Episode 40, but many times I also get a yes right away, even from the people I didn’t know at all before. I think it helps when I write a very personalized, and thoughtful email sharing reasons why I want to interview them.
Since now that I’m on the receiving end of these emails too, people reaching out to me to interview me for their podcast, or inviting me to speak, and I am much more likely to say yes, if I find that they really like and support my work, and share the reasons why they want to to interview me, and do it in a way that is really authentic.
I once had someone who told me that if I look at the list of people I have interviewed on my podcast and for my book, and examine the common themes of these people, that will reflect a lot about me and my values. I thought wow, that’s interesting, so I went and looked at the list of the people I interviewed, I realized that all of them were somehow underdogs and succeeded against the odds. So I think it shows that I’m inspired by these stories.
And like them, I also had to overcome a lot of obstacles in my life, and when I see people who are not defined by their circumstances, and rose above failures and rejections and succeeded, and use their “success” to humbly serve others, then I’m really inspired.
Ok next question.
Knowing what you know now, is there anything that you would have done differently in your past?
So I had to think about this question for awhile. I don’t regret the decisions I have made in the past, because I did the best I could with the information I had then.
But if I knew then what I know now, there are some things that I would have done differently.
Most importantly, I wouldn’t have worried so much. I definitely am a worrier and I used to worry all the time since I was young, like if I don’t get good grades, if I don’t get into good school, or if I don’t get a good job, somehow I was going to turn out to be a failure in life.
I lived my life very much motivated by fear, and it was really hard.
So I wish I could go back to my younger self and tell her to stop worrying so much, and to just relax, and that everything will be okay.
And that one grade on an exam is not going to determine my future.
I also wish I had started doing things that brings me joy much earlier in my life. When I was young, I only allowed myself to do things if I thought it was going to somehow help me to get into a better school or get a better job.
If you have been listening to my show for awhile, you know that one of the turning points in my life was after I became a lawyer, I felt like I had done everything right but my life felt so wrong.
I was working at big law firm in NYC at the time and even though the paychecks and fancy offices were nice, I couldn’t help but feel that there had to be more to life than just getting a paycheck and living for the weekend.
So for the first time in my life, I gave myself the permission to do the things that brings me joy even though it had nothing to do with my job.
And this led to me writing my book, starting my community Give One Dream to help people pursue their dreams, starting my podcast, and all of these led to me working as a coach, which I believe is my calling.
And I wish I had given myself the permission to do the things that bring my joy much earlier in my life. And if I had done that, I think I would have had a lot more fun experiences and maybe even figured out my path a lot earlier too.
Ok next question
Starting from an investment banker to corporate lawyer and now career coach, have you had days when you felt “stuck” or felt as if you were on the wrong train of life? Can you share with us what you did during those periods to find yourself come out on the other side? (For example, did you meet with a lot of people and ask for advice/read books/listen to pods, etc.?)
Of course I’ve had many days when I felt stuck as I just talked about in my response to the previous question.
I definitely felt like I was on the wrong train of life heading towards a direction that I did not want to go.
I remember feeling really down and it was really ironic because on the outside, everything seemed to be going so well. I was working at a big law firm, getting a nice paycheck, and living in a nice apartment building. But I just felt like there wasn’t much meaning because I was working so hard to make rich people even richer.
So I definitely didn’t see my future there, but then what do I next? How do I even figure out what my path is?
I just felt really stuck and didn’t know what to do because what I thought I had wanted and worked so hard for, turned out to be not what I wanted.
And I remember talking to my dad about it and he said, I’ll be supportive but only you can get yourself out of this situation. So do whatever it takes.
So in my desperate attempt to find what it is that I really want to do in my life, I started following my curiosities and started to pursue interests that I found to be fun and meaningful, even though they had nothing to do with my career.
As I shared before, for the first time in my life, I gave myself permission to do the things that brought me joy even though they weren’t going to help me boost my resume to get the next job or get into a better school.
And I remember hearing somewhere “When is the last time you’ve done something for the first time?” And I just couldn’t remember the last time I did anything different. I was always doing the same thing, meeting the same people at work, and also had same group of friends who were mostly all lawyers.
And if you want your life to change, you need to do something different or meet new people.
So I created this goal of “Try something for the first time every week.”
It could be as small as eating something different at a restaurant or going to a new neighborhood I haven’t been before, or going to a show about a topic I know nothing about, or going to a new event where I didn’t know anyone, (of course this is before the pandemic), and so basically I tried to do something that I normally wouldn’t do or tried to put myself in a new and unfamiliar environments or even uncomfortable situations.
And this helped me to learn more about myself and also helped to get out of the autopilot. And because I was doing new things, and trying new things, it was easier to get out of my head of all the negative self talk and worry, because I just had less time, and taking action makes you feel better.
I think the worst thing to do when you feel stuck is to do nothing. The feeling of being stuck plus inaction just compounds all the anxiety and worry.
And I also remember I made a deliberate attempt to meet new people outside of law, outside of my profession. I knew that I didn’t want to be a lawyer for the rest of my life but pretty much everyone around me at the time was a lawyer, and most lawyers are risk averse and even though many of them weren’t happy in their jobs, they also accepted it as fate that that’s just how life is and what do you expect, of course you are gonna hate your job. That’s why you get paid for it.
But I refused to live my life like that. So I tried my best to meet people outside of law. And around this time, I had an opportunity to host a talk show for a small cable television in NYC and while I was hosting the show, I was fascinated by the people who I interviewed who loved what they did.
I remember interviewing this entrepreneur and he said something that I will never forget, and he said, “Celina I love what I do so much, I cannot NOT do it.”
And that idea of loving what you do so much that not doing it is not an option, was so new, different, and almost shocking to me because I’d never met anyone like that.
And I realized it is possible to do what you love and get paid for it.
And through the talk show, I met many other people from different industries who loved what they did, and I just felt like my life was expanded.
So if you are feeling stuck, or want to make a career transition, or you want your life to change somehow, try to get out of your normal circle of people you always talk to. I’m not saying abandon all your friends, but don’t spend all your time with them, and try to build new relationships with people in an industry that you want to work for or if you don’t know what you want to do next, or just meet people from different industries and different walks of life.
I’m sure you’ve heard this saying that you are an average of 5 people that you spend the most time with, right?
So be mindful about who you spend your time with. Because how you think and act will be influenced by those people.
So if you are stuck, try to do new things, meet new people, and take action to move yourself forward. It could be small things like reading a book about a topic you are interested in or listening to inspirational podcast that gives you the motivation and encouragement, and I hope that you will give yourself the permission to explore your curiosities and do the things that brings you joy even if it has nothing to do with your job or career right now.
I want to share with you my favorite quote, by the poet Rumi,
“As you start to walk on the way, the way appears.”
So I hope you will keep walking, keep taking that step, and just trust the journey.
Ok next question.
I personally try to remind myself to “start before I’m ready” whenever I feel fear and doubt creeping across my mind. What are your top 3 mindset elements that in your opinion, creates a successful life?
I think it’s totally normal to feel the fear and doubt when we are starting something new. But what we need to not do is to let those emotions prevent us from just getting started.
So Many of us stand in our own way of living the life we want, because fear stops us from taking action. so it’s crucial to overcome our internal struggles, learn how to reframe failure and rejection, and learn to be able to manage our negative inner-voice.
So here are my top 3 mindset elements that creates a successful life.
The first one is the ability to overcome rejections and reframe them as the proof and evidence that you are taking action and getting one step closer towards your goals and dreams.
I talked about this extensively in Episode, 48, the episode titled How to Turn No into Yes, where I shared the stories of the rejections I got while writing my book, so I’m not going to go into all the details, but please listen to that episode if you haven’t yet, because I talked all about how we can overcome rejections and not let our fear of getting our feelings hurt get in the way of going after what we want.
The second important mindset is being able to manage our inner negative voice and know that it is part of us, but not all of us. Everybody has inner negative, that voice that tells us that we are not good enough or that we can’t do something, and what if doesn’t work out, what if I fail… that’s our inner negative voice. We all have it but how much power we give to it is entirely up to us. I have a whole podcast episode just about this topic too so if you want to listen to it, I’ll have the link in today’s show notes. it’s Episode 22, Second Step towards career Happiness, Overcome Internal Obstacles.
I think this is really important and it’s actually part of my coaching framework called LOVE, which I designed and use to coach all my clients to figure out what they want, and to transition out of unfulfilling jobs and into careers they love. LOVE is an acronym
Learn About Yourself
Overcome Internal Obstacles
Visualize Your Success
Explore & Take Action
I’ve talked about this coaching framework in my previous episodes too, so I’ll have the link in today’s show notes.
And the third mindset that I think is important for success is the ability to tell yourself a positive story about yourself and your life, which then creates a positive relationship with yourself.
I’ve had many opportunities to interview some very successful people in different industries for my podcast and for my book, and what I’ve learned is that the most important story of our life is the story we tell ourselves about our own lives.
Because how we see ourselves, and how we talk to ourselves, and the relationship we have with ourselves determine all the success and happiness we will have in our life.
So for example, the people I’ve interviewed who have achieved incredible amount of success didn’t necessarily come from privileged backgrounds or had the best education, and they had a lot of obstacles and failures in their lives.
But they didn’t let their circumstances define them, or let any failure or rejection prevent them from getting back up and trying again. And they were able to interpret what happened to them into a positive story about resilience and strength which then moved them forward.
Ok next question,
I know that you mentioned procrastinating previously on your episode, but do you have any other aspects or habits about yourself that you want to change or working on to improve?
Yes! I have many habits that I want to change, but one big one is I tend to go to bed really late because I’m a night owl and I’ve been like this all my life.
I am much more productive and creative at night, but a lot of times I was made to feel bad about this because I think our society tends to think that late sleepers are lazy. But it’s not necessarily true !
But i know that going to bed really late is not good for my health so I’ve been trying to go to bed a bit earlier but it’s challenging because as many of you know, I’m in Korea right now, temporarily, and working US hours, so it’s really tough. I guess once I go back to NYC, it may be better, but I don’t know how I can change this habit because I’ve been a night owl all my life. My mom even said that when I was a baby, I’d stay up late and wanted to play, and wouldn’t want to bed, and had a really hard time waking up in the morning.
So if you are a night owl like me, and if you have any strategies that helped you to go to bed a bit earlier, I’d love to hear from you and learn what has helped you.
Ok next question.
Will you write another book?
The answer is YES!!
My editor in Korea is actually waiting for me to write another book, but I haven’t been able to because I’ve so busy, but yes I will definitely write another book at some point.
My dream is to publish more books in the future both in Korean and also in English, and that book to be translated into another language, other than Korean or English. So there I said it, and now I have to make it happen 🙂
I think it will be so cool know that my stories can be shared with audiences who speak a different language than I do, and then I’ll know that I have somehow touched their lives or helped them in some way even though we don’t speak the same language.
Ok, that’s all the questions and answers I wanted to share with you today, and I want to let you know that this is the last episode of Season 3 of my podcast. I’m going to take a short break to work on the episodes for the next season, and I promise I won’t be gone for long.
In the meantime, I hope you will check out some of my episodes you haven’t had a chance to listen yet, and please let me know if there are people you want me to interview or topics you want me to talk about in the new season.
And also, I’ll be hosting rooms on Clubhouse every week. I’ve had several fun conversations in the past few weeks. We’ve talked about how to stop procrastinating, how to overcome rejections, and in the future, we’ll talk about other topics that will inspire you and help you to achieve your goals and dreams.
I’ve been having weekly rooms on Saturday at 9pm ET, and I most likely will keep that time every week, I think, but if you follow me, you’ll be the first to be notified when I schedule new rooms. My ID to Clubhohuse is celinalee that is celinalee.
I also created Live Your Dream club on Clubhouse to create a community to support you in your journey to fulfilling career and to achieve your dreams. So I hope you will come and join me and I’ll include the link to my Clubhouse profile in the show notes for today’s episode and you’ll be able to see Live Your Dream club at the bottom of my profile. And please let me know if you want an invitation to Clubhouse and to Live Your Dream Club.
If you’re looking for guidance on how to find happiness and fulfillment in your career, I put together a guide to the three steps to finding true career fulfillment.
In this guide, I share the three common themes of the people who have achieved incredible amount of success and if you find what those three things are for you, I can guarantee you that you’ll not only have a successful career, but also a very fulfilling life. So if you want to check it out, you can download it by clicking on today’s show notes on your podcast app or on my website, celinalee.co that is is celinalee.co
And if you enjoy listening my podcast or it helped you in any way, I would be so grateful if you can please tell your friends about it and also write me a review on Apple Podcast or Podchaser where you can write a review even from Android phone. This is the best way you can help me to grow my podcast so more people can find out about it.
I actually check several times a day to see if there’s a new review, I know it’s kind of funny and silly, but this is how I know you are listening and what I’m creating is actually helpful for you. So if you want to make my day, please write me a review on Apple Podcast or Podchaser, and I’d be so grateful.
If you have questions about my one-on-one coaching, or have any thoughts or questions about my podcast, you can reach out to me on my website celinalee.co/contact,, that is celinalee.co/contact, or click on today’s show notes on your podcast app and that will take you to my website.
Thank you so much for listening!
Wondering how my coaching can help you? Here is what my clients have said about their experiences of working with me.
Download the 3 Steps to True Career Fulfillment Here
There comes a time in your career when you question your professional happiness and fulfillment. This can be a defining moment if you take the time to ask yourself important questions and take action towards career that brings you joy.
If you are feeling stuck and don’t know what to do next, you are not alone. With the right guidance and a little momentum, you can be happy and fulfilled personally and professionally. If you’re looking for clarity and next steps, check out this guide, the 3 Steps to Finding True Career Fulfillment.
I use a 3-part framework to help you take the next step towards doing work you love and believe in. Get your copy here.
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